Well that maternity leave flew by! I go back to work tomorrow and let me tell you, my emotions are crazy!
I’m excited, nervous, happy, sad, anxious, worried, and more. I am truly looking forward to returning to work and getting some routine and structure back in my life. I know Liam feels the same way. However I am going to miss my time with Liam and Owen.
I feel like Owen is just so little still and I don’t feel ready for him to go to daycare even though I know he will do great and I have the best daycare provider. I find myself wishing for just a few more weeks to increase his stability and allow me just a little more time to watch him grow.
I returned to work part time with Liam but this time I am going back full time and I’m super excited about it but also terribly sad. Just writing this has me tearing up. I know it’s going to be hard and will take time to adjust and eventually it will be okay although I know I will always miss my babies.
Owen has been the happiest and easiest baby this maternity leave which makes it even harder to be away from home. His snuggles, smiles, and love all day long are going to be missed.
I’m also breastfeeding which has been amazing but will be a constant reminder while I’m at work that I’m not with my baby.
Now although I’m very sad and going to miss my boys, going back to work full time is a choice I have made for me and my family. I enjoy my job, I worked hard to get my job, and it is very rewarding. I truly am looking forward to going back to work but that doesn’t make it easier to be away.
I’m very thankful that I am returning for a 2 day week rather than starting with a full week. I feel it will make my transition to work a little easier.
I know I’m not the only one who has felt this way and I’m thankful for those who are encouraging me during this time. I’m lucky to have family and friends who are so supportive and understanding of this emotional rollercoaster.
Please wish me luck and keep me in your thoughts as I return to work…it will feel like a really long day I’m sure.